Tuesday, April 26, 2005

So why did we write all this?

there you have it, metamorphosis....
ashu is now our "godfather" (look how he's looking out for us), pavan is now the resident humorist poking fun at our very popular lady-killin-bike-ridin-joke-crackin-ding-dong-bole-singin sindhi bhai(this is the same guy who was too shy to talk to people in the first sem), sindhibhai is now doing legal 'briefs' (no girish, I never looked), vipul singhal is now working (there's no mistake, I repeat, working) till late night,(dont remember a single project/presentation the guy prepared for), our resident hardworking researcher sukhban is actually enjoying the fact that he gets off from work early and he can go back and relax, and i, the inimitable, the..the...oh f***, i'm lost for words......
I suppose there are also other ppl in our class who read these mails. hmm...now my earnest request to them would be to start writing to the egroup, not the usual crappy forwarded stuff but possibly something original (but them ud have to outsource the job 2 me again). even yogi's kind of alien, kinky, incomprehensible, ludicrous, preposterous, nutty, asinine writing is acceptable.
bara kai mandali, mug aapan nantar bhetu...
Hail Vinod "The Torch" Torgal

It makes me jump with joy .. literally.. to find someone accept my ludicrous, incomprehensible writing. But make no mistake my writing has nothing to do with mt real life experiences. For
"They" are here. to all those nonbelievers(esp V.T...now i wouldnt like the V.T station named after him..I heard they cleaned it up as soon as i had written my previous mail...boy..these people in the BMC really work fast when they have to), we had been warned...and rightfully so by a prophetic individual...now whom i consider as powerful as the great, exalted "Nosetradamus". I appeal to you O great peeople of the holy abode of "Cheatnana" to TAKE CARE(atleast carry your phasers,communicators along with you) for the day aint far when we shall find "GEEREESH" actually chasing us down the service road flinging banana peels at us. And make no mistake, his kinetic is no lean machine, it is a computerised, fully robotised space craft.believe me you wouldnt want to bear the pain of listening to his jokes( which is exponentially dangerous than the thrid degree torture used by Hitler and the likes.) which he shall subject us too once he gets hold of us. forewarned is "forearmed". We already had two forearms.. and now that we have been warned by the gerat one ... we have four forearms... which we can use to hold our pants when the aliens attack us again. Its not without great mental contemplation and introspection, coupled with excessive indulgence in the economics of peer wellbeing that the great one has chanted out that presently ubiquitous mantra of his. Pay heed and you shall live to write crappy replies to messages like these. Ciao.(heheh)
Dream like you shall live forever....Live like you will die tomorrow..????

deepak! jokes? what jokes?now u've made me think twice. i'm tryin to reason it all backwards now..u mean that my missing socks and other "stuff" was not taken by nasa for advanced research? mebbe one of my friends took it? now that gives me nightmares...now all of us will never be able to sleep peacefully knowing that one of our own is actually on 'their' side! I mean, how do u realy really really know girish is not an alien on a two wheeled joke-weapon armed ufo? i mean, just look at him...can i not believe my eyes now? and as far as his legal notices are concerned, it is all the more cause for alarm! Look "they" too can now spout nonstop nonsense like us humans.now that they have the ultimate weapon, look what they could do to us. can u imagine a hundred/thousand/lakh/crore.. girishs all around telling u a joke at the same time? or mebbe singing "mera dil ding-dong bole?"(all you people with weak imaginations, please see matrix-reloaded for the scene where i fight hundreds of identical agents). yogesh, can you imagine then that the banana peels are not flying by themselves and are actually rocket-propelled, biological,psychological warfare weapons being used by the superpowers to scare the bejasus out of mere psychos like you? maybe your pants disappeared only because u forgot to tie the drawstrings and sorta were dazed when they fell off? and pavan, then maybe u need to be all the more scared of an earthling girish riding a rickety kinetic chasing u along a service road, probably because..because its girish! aliens could probably be reasoned with, but girish with blood shot eyes on a kinetic!(i can already sense another script for bhoot pt.2 coming up...) thanx for the revelation deepak, i now know whom i've got to protect my pants from, all credit to you..i was living in a false world, but now i'm back, much to the chagrin of lesser ordinary mortals.....

Hi pals,
Great to see such a lovely sense of humour developing in our friends! Very creative indeed! and quite literary!A pleasure to read and laugh to! my salutations to "THE LIGHT BEARER OF
CHETANAS"(PHILIPS BULB OOPS SORRY LIGHTING DIVISION MANAGER)MR vt and TO ANOTHER GREAT PERSON AGAIN mr yogesh (ujjave)(heavenly light)I am blessed now I understand why chetana inspite of power failures never suffered from darkness.Two aliens(oops sorry thats for lower mortals like me),two time -machines(gosh again sorry)TWO LIGHT-MACHINES(ya i got it this time) have enveloped and have bathed CHETANA in divine light.First things last ok MR VT comes second.The honourable MODERN SHAKESPEAR of today MASTER UJJAVE has let loose his vocabulary iterations in such a voracious way that it has left practically entire chetana in a daze.The guys and gals are not able to understand whether ur giving a comprehension for a CAT exam and if so where r the questions.Tone down ur rhetoric apphorisms.I request u to start reading some maths also so that we can have another genius in a few months(OHWELL LETS MAKE IT WEEKS) in our midst.well if my kinetic is a computerized spacecraft then probably we are already 50000 years ahead in history (I am assuming that technology will be there at that time at a level compatible to transfer "lean"machines like my kinetic aww SO SORRY with VT Aaround its not gonna take more than 50 years how dumb of me ).U guys r right on one thing my jokes are indeed worse than 3rd degree torture But i wanna confirm this stastically.tell u what guys i will spend a full day(ok a week)happy with u two and try to check if there is indeed a correlation or regression(damn it I shouldnt have bunked KALIMS lectures) IF u guys manage to "SURVIVE"that period then WE WILL GO FOR TEST"2"I.E a full month.I would like u guys to keep on trying to fail "me".THIS WOULD BE AN INTERESTING GAME RIGHT OR RATHER "lets say a dangerous laughing game is about to begin"IT would be very difficult VT for me to pursue anyone withour help on kinetic because I WILLNEED SOMEONE TO "LIGHT "MY WAY something that u can aptly do .well A SEQUEL would be say a little difficult 'CRAZY GENIUSES INTELLUCTUALS with some minor defects like say one of PEPSIthirsty eyes r not born everyday". Nice to hear from u manjari .hope ur having fun. u made a nice point about the food nivedita.HDFC being market leader in housing has a synergy with food preparation.I think soon after preparing house they will hop onto the foodwagon and start selling both in crossdistribution.Probably they r internally branding "select "employees in this training first.WHITE MAN SHOW(oh I mean chips) would be rather pleased if u would tell him about this idea He would probably giveanother of his "FASCINATING,KNOWLEDGE DRIVEN"special case studies for presentation.gosh WHATever he taught is being"used"by us guys in the corporate world we gonna thank for properly ""UTILISING"" and enlightening us for 6 months. bye take care, BY THE WAY where isw the GODFATHER who augurs his wishes for our common good take care

Sincere request Attn : Yogesh, Girish, Vinod, Pavan and all other out of India creatures (for they appear to be like that) With due respect, I request ur honour to write something that can be understood by one and all. Thinkof some "garreeeb manoooos" like us.Hoping to hear rather read something that's understandable..................ok....so i was right after all.....'prophesy'--(hope the spelling is rigt coz this mail is read by some realy gr8 people) that is what it was when i said everybody to take care. we all will be meeting at neeta's sisters mariage. yogi, vt, and Girish i have made a word file which has a list of words which I learnt reading the recent mails and counter mails and counter counter mails...plz help me understand what r the meanings of these words. poor me...i jus had a noble intention and it sparked off a controversy of sorts.as for girish - plz spare the words 'take care' for me -- its patented under the copyright act of Mrs.Nadkarni (the same person who drafted the patents regime for the WTO).it took 2 years and 1 mail to bring out the best in everybody...let's hope to continue this lighter side... bye and take care

Greetings Earth(oops ...sorry)"Geerishling"(bad ..bad...i know it sucks...but what the heck)I accept your challenge to spend the day with you subjecting myself to the worst torture humankind or any other kind for that matter must..or shall every encounter. It dawns upon me that you are indeed of the other kind...the kind i suspected you to be of. Again my fellow "Chetanaites" i prove this by the fact that the "alienated one" referred to a term of the form " Crossdistribution". Make no mistake.. what it means that Mr Geerish is the result of a scientifically directed and monitored "Crosspollination" process....undertaken by Mr Geerish himself to unleash his wrath on all those who ASSassinated(or should i say Butchered) his character. The process of his transformation has not been hasty..but has been carefully crafted out and subtly timed( it all started when the great prophet, his holiness, his ...his...warned us and appealed us to TAKE CARE). His double degree has helped him immensely( his B.E to develop machines of mass destruction...like his magnificiently disguised UFO...and also the banana peels..that turn into UFO's with little green GEErishmen in them that try to numb us by releasing their ungainly, unpredictable, unfathomable, unpalatable jokes, and his B.com that helped to create that limited "Character Purview" he symbolizes himself with( What a disguise... i guess i have to give him credit for this). His ability to work with regression(or was it correlation...or variance..or chi square..o what the heck) for evaluating the statistics of the torture to be subjected upon the Divinely Light of Chetana Mr V.T and myself, suggests a highly complex and demented mind that will stop at nothing( and believe me the Honourable professor Kalim Khan has nothing to do with this). I propound, my dear friends, at this point, that as long as there exists mr geerish's morbid proclivity towards palatable liquids that are aerated, he shall keep on unleashing wrath, havoc, chaos of unprecedented scale on all of us. I suggest, that to nullify the intensity of the suffering( for those poor mortals), prevent Mr geerish from having those dangerous( for us) liquids and i guarantee you that we shall live to see Mr V.T finally taking care of chetanas power failures once and for all.A dungeon that is dark...and a dungeon that has a bulb.... got to the one that is dark...for you may regret flicking on that bulb.....?????Take care dudes/dudettes and keep rocking Respected or maybe REVERED GRANDFATHER (OOPS I MEAN GODFATHER) HEHEHE i cant stay without jokes even in letters.That was a nice one u pulled on mrs nadkarni.It would have left her probably reeling under a headspin coming from a "dedicated" candidate like u. ur one line sparked off a slew of letters .wonder what would happen in the markets if u just drop a subtle hint on the economic working of the indian economy. I dont think that even allan greenspan could have had such an impact in the financial world markets.gimme a few hints by telling me which shares to invest in so that a poor chap can earn some dough. have a nice time and ya about the vocabulary yogi and vt are the right candidates .i was just trying to ape them. bye and "EVERYBODY TAKE CARE"

Diana Ross - I Will Survive
(This is dedicated to girish)
At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinkin' I could never live with you by my side
Then I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong
And I grew strong
And I learned how to get along
And so you're back from outer space
I just walked in to find you here, with that sad look
upon your face
I should have changed that stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I had known for just one second you'd be back to
bother me
Go on now, go walk out the door
Just turn around now
'Coz you're not welcome anymore
Weren't you the one who tried to break me with goodbye?
Did you think I'd crumble?
Did you think I'd lay down and die?
Oh no not I, I will survive
For as long as I know how to love, I know I'll stay alive
I've got all my life to live
And I've got all my love to give
I'll survive
I will survive

nice one vt....why girish but?


Mohit Dhawan said...

how on earth you got enough time to write such a long blog!!!!!!!
i wonder..............